So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
