I will die if light touches me.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
this boner is exhausting
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
