I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
