Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
We are all done wearing pants today
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
