i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I wear drunk well.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
