are you still at the devil's house?
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
