Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
