I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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