Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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