As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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