why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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