Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
He passed out mid-signature
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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