apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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