If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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