he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Randomize
