we have officially lost it.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize