you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
