Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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