I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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