I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
