i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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