week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
