I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
It's rum buckets o'clock
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
