we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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