i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
