Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
