He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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