Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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