1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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