OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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