normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
