He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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