The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
