His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
