I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
