it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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