ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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