i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
