isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I have feelings that need drinking.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
