i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
did you just send me my own nude
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
