I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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