I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
