She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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