Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize