How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
