Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
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