just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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