When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
