pedialite and red bull = repair kit
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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