remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
